BoH

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Cheerio and have a lovely day!
Anna

Three songs to help things pass:

Patrick Wolf - The Sun Is Often Out | Last on the playlist, spotted by the lovely vangogh_ourears. This song might make you feel worse before it makes you feel better because it is painfully spot on.

Is your work of art so heavy
That it will not let you live?

You'll be missed.

...

The sun, the sun!
The sun is often out.

The sun, the sun, the sun...



Why? - Gemini (Birthday Song)

When we're on different sides of the globe
I thought we'd keep our veins tangled
like a pair of mic cables,
And if there ain't enough slack to reach
that we'd solder them together
and across oceans they'd stretch.
Our faces reflected in separate windshields
and all our body hair pricked up
an elephant eyelash.
Should we be tempted by thief or saint
it seems I leave and you stay
to crawl the cage and curse.
But don't regret the done dirt,
there is no life plan set,
you just swallow the cold
and follow your breath until death.


Rock Plaza Central - We've Got A Lot to be Glad for

We won't stop running 'til we get to the lights,
When we get to the lights we'll stop running.

And the lights are like fiery knives.
Those candles burn with something we've got inside.
And you and I, we've got a lot to be glad for.
And you and I, we've got a lot to be glad for.


I'm going to be gone for the next month or so. The break comes at a convenient time so that I can get the hell over this. Clear my head and stop being so emo. GODDAMN YOU, ROSS. YOU WILL NOT MAKE ME EMO. This was his master plan, I reckon. I will take time to accept. Move on. Grow! Other clichés! If you need to reach me, send me a PM. I imagine that things will be entirely different by the time I come back.

I won't deny that this has hit me hard. Not everyone is as upset as me, some of you are more thrown by this than I am. If I never said it, then let me say it now: I love you to bits. We will feel better and we will get over this and we will be stronger for it. Hugs and kisses to you all. <3

Happiness

1.
Thank you for life, Mother.
Today I wrote a few lines.
That is all. I am happy.

2.
Once there was a group of friends
And youth. Everyone lived.
Each day was like creation
Still continued. Now
I alone, shadow of old,
Thoroughly eaten by memories
Rotten, falling tree,
Degree by degree closer
To soil’s futility, to silence.

3.
Summer scenery: bay’s end,
Sauna, beach and boat
And heat, the smell of pines,
Flowers, sparkling fish,
Children, children, the children and
The old happy echo:
Dad, hey!

4.
I made a song about a butterfly
And I drew a breath. It flew.

5.
Warmth against warmth, spilled,
Gushed over. We fell silent.
When and where? We did not know.
We were together and loved.

6.
From Pirkkala, Pispala, Harjuntie, whoosh,
Pebbles to the well of Tahmela,
Girl said: Write, write then…
And the sun peaked to heights.

7.
Light has appeared in your window.
You are home again.
I have missed you there.

And the North Star is in its place.
You stay to watch.
The flow goes on. From where to where?

You didn’t enjoy your summer around here.
I only saw the stars
In the scent of the flowery hill.

8.
The narrow path from the well to the door overgrown with grass.
In front of the window
A withered apple tree stands.
A rucksack in the hook by the door
With a bird's nest inside.

When I have died, when I have died.
Summer will go on. Summer.


- Lauri Viita, "Onni", 1965

Ryan and Jon are leaving Panic.

I... Um. I don't.

Makes sense. Jon and Ryan come across as having this musical bond thing. Brendon and Spencer hang out all the time, it seems Brendon and Ryan barely even talk... This sort of divide makes sense, I suppose. Jon and Ryan want to say goodbye to the emo band shadow Panic still carries, be respectable musicians instead of Pete's discovery kids. Okay. Right.

I don't want to over-react, I'm just trying to make sense of this. There is no PATD if half of the band leaves. I mean. What, they are a duo now? Bren plays guitar, Spencer has a good ol' go at the tambourine!

I'm not making sense. I'm upset.

It's on MySpace, FOE, Decaydance, etc. etc.

Jon and Ryan have quit the band.

If Ryan Ross had been the genius, fame-phobic songwriter of a prog rock band in the 70's, what would his band have been called?

Give me anything, no matter how random or ridic!

We got back today from our Euro-roadtrip thingy. Everything went great and as planned. If anything, I am sort of fumbling with they keyboard because it's been so long since I sat in front of my baby. I'll try to write up a not-too-long recap with pictures when I get around to it. Tomorrow, maybe.

So what's new? PATD single in August. \o/ A certain popstar died. /o\ A shit load of BBBs to catch up with. Also, the story I did my fanmix for just recently got posted and, for some fucked up reason, the link to the mix didn't work and it was the only copy of it. I didn't even save the tracklist, so what was on it? Uh... I remember half of the songs. *headdesk* Waaait! I do have the tracklist! But Gmail isn't working, fucker. Okay, this isn't a crisis anymore, I can actually fix this. Phewww. Edit: Scratch that, no tracklist. Crisis ongoing.

To Write -list:
- finish superpower!Joncer
- start properly writing travel!Ryden which I did a lot of mental sketching for during the trip, and the story can now be called "Ryan breaks his arm, names the cast 'Leonard' and fucks off to Amsterdam" fic.
- sketch bunker!fic. Or, well, underground-city!fic.

tbh, this post is completely useless. I just wanted to use my new icon. I crack up eeeevery time. LOOK AT IT.

Uh, how to make this useful... um. We're leaving this afternoon, but we're not leaving the country until Thursday. Taking a ferry ship thingy from Helsinki to Northern Germany! It's going to take a full 24 hours, but I hear that the ship has a jacuzzi! \o/

I'm not a snippet person, but here, ( have a snippet of the superpower!Joncer I've been raving about. )

I renewed my shiny paid account and got some more icon space for it, so icon! Look at Justin! Look! *squishes* *giggle snorts* *clears throat and walks away in a composed manner*

Catch you later. <3

Posted the BBB, and I am now 84% done with my million words of slash goal. When I came up with the concept I thought I'd get to a million no problem. Now I doubt it will happen. I think I'm getting bored of slash, more or less.

See, here's the thing. We are not running out of ideas and neither has "good fic" stopped coming. With the BBBs going on, we can be sure of two things:
1. There are millions of ideas.
2. Plenty of good fic is being written in bandom.

Oftentimes I simply feel like the fic is very repetitive. Boy meets boy, and they are either faced with an obstacle preventing their epic love or the plot simply follows them getting together. The climax of the story is them fucking, which is almost instantaneously followed by the end. "They fucked! Now there is nothing more to say!" I have pretty much described 95% of my own stories here too.

It's this Barbie doll thing. You can dress up the Barbie in new clothes again and again, and some clothes are more elaborate than others, but the doll itself stays the same. And is it just me or does it get boring to read about X and Y ending up together again and again? What about the story where the focus is not on the sex or even on the relationship? Because when I was scrolling down the very first BBBs, the first one I clicked was a gen fic. Yeah, no kidding. It just felt like a breath of fresh air, so maybe that is an indication that it is time to move on.

Then again, I am a slash writer, this is a slashy world we live in. We are here for the romance and the sex, for crying out loud, so should I just stop bitching about the repetitve and currently uninspiring - for me, at least - nature of slash stories? I still do grin like an idiot when I read something where the boys end up happily together, so it isn't as if I am suddenly immune, but that gratification surely isn't enough to keep me interested as a writer. Do I just need to be knocked some sense into or do these feelings of frustration or boredom have some validity? Should I accept that slash is what it is and not question something so obvious? I'd love to hear some other takes on this.

We writers can dress up the Barbie in different clothes as many times as we want, give it new a life, new interests, give it new names.

But what about the doll?

Soooo I was dared to be a fruitist or, uh, a fruitarian, I don't even know what the fuck it is, for a week. Day 1. I had two kiwis for breakfast. I could never be vegan, let alone survive on fruit alone. Om nom nom cheese! But I can do this out of stubborn pride.

I gave the Ryden travel!fic a slightly new twist, we'll see what happens. I decided on the hotel Ryan is staying at in Amsterdam, it's pretty sweet.

I would like to vote Sunset Rubdown's You Go On Ahead (Trumpet, Trumpet II) as the best song of 2009. I wish I could link it here, but I can't find it. "And I'd like to throw this trumpet down and go on empty-handed/And I'd like to think I am not one of them but I know I am/So I'd like to just follow you awhile." Spencer is such a fucking good lyricist. And I did mention the drums, right?

Election day for the European Parliament. If you are a European Union citizen, go vote! Go, go, go! My candidate speaks six languages fluently, the bloody show off.

Lastly, I would like to thank Zack for fueling us with hints of drama. Battling? Oh reeeeally? I'll take hate-sex!fic any day, thanks.

( Queer As Folk - again. But I swear this is the last of it! Potential spoilers (who cares the show finished 4 years ago?). And then some talk about bandom/fandom and migrations there of, and how you're not getting rid off me yet. )

I feel like I need to reinvent my writing. Prompt me with scenarios! It might get some creative juices flowing (yes, that sounds dirty).

Off to bed, gotta get up at 4.15am. My life? Is not as awesome as yours. :/

( The return of the Memester. )

Also, that guy earlier today who looked exactly like Jon. I was this close to taking a picture of him as proof! It was so disturbing! It was like I was watching Jon Walker sniff his armpits (this guy did) and pick his nose (this guy did) and, oh, wow, I hope Jon has more manners than that guy. It was surreal, I tell you. He has a twin brother and I should bone him.

( Music babble. Again. )

Okay, I've written 15k of superpower!Joncer, but I'm not really digging it at the moment so it's on hiatus for now. So I have turned my attention to angsty!timetravel fic, and I need help.

I need lots of help, actually.

Basically, I want to know all there is to know about pre-record deal!Panic, Brendon more specifically. ( I really, really could use some help with these questions. Show off your PATD knowledge! )

Welcome to my first ever picspam! What is it of? Brendon's ass? Jon sweating on stage? Nay!

Have you ever asked yourself the question: what if Panic at the Disco was a girl band? Of course you have! Everyone has! *cough* Visualising it might be difficult, but it is not anymore! This is the Panic at the Disco as Girls Picspam.

All pictures were taken from syntheticpubes.com and belong to the respective artists. This was compiled by me and _sugar, who has an excellent eye for these things. <3 I was the one who had the urge to share.

Warning: Contains explicit female nudity, though it is not pornographic. Also might make you feel a bit gay because damn. Damn.

( 40+ pictures. And onwards to our boys as girls! Our girls! )

I can't do an American accent to save my life. It's so bad it's not even funny, and then I end up trying to do the Catherine Tate "oh my god, really? Oh my god, whatever. Like, totally." thing, which is even more absurd.

( Long story short, have some accent help for the British!AU fic. Provided by YouTube, compiled be me. YouTube is home to some ridiculous shit, but I guess we knew that already. )

Completely self-indulgent because I want to have this in my journal forever and ever and ever and ever.



And ever and ever and ever -

I take it all back! Aaaaaall of it! Twitter was the best thing that ever happened to the music industry! Nay! The World!

p.s. Note the tag that is perfectly appropriate for my personal journal but not, say, Spencer's twitter.
p.p.s. I flipped it around so we could all appreciate the world as Spencer sees it. And ooh, Rushmore poster! Stalking has never been as much fun!

The most perfect spot on this planet? It just might be.



To live and die there! To live... and die there.

Yeah, man. Yeah.

p.s. Ry and Bren decided to unite forces and get into real estate. Bless their stupid faces!

World Wide Earth Hour is today. At 8.30 pm, no matter where you live - turn the lights off for an hour. That's all you have to do. (You can still browse your flist in darkness if you so wish!)

The goal is to make one billion people do this in an attempt to show the political leaders of the world that you and me and everyone else wants them to seriously tackle the problem of global warming, and to do it now. What better time to let them know what we want than at the eve of G20? (Though I think they are more concerned with the economic crisis. No, wait, there's a global warming conference being held in Copenhagen. So, at the eve of that!)

Vote Earth. Thank you.

\o/

I just finished my BBB! It went over the minimum word count rather nicely because I just can't shut up, but whatevs! I think I need to edit the ending a lot, make it better and so on, but the point remains - it's done. \o/ Testing audience people - you know what this means. I'll email you guys the fucker before bed. And everyone else... um... BBB-is-finished cookies! Yay!

Happy Monday. <3

( A praisal of my buddy, Craig Finn. Under a cut because I know not many care, but he is so AWESOME. )

Anyway, British!AU is looking good - well, at least it gets longer and longer. I'll feel bad posting a substantially long standalone because I know not many people simply have the time to stop what they're doing and read something that lengthy on the spot - but I suppose that's not the point. People will read stories when they get around to it, if it's something they want to read. And that's all any writer wants! Anyway, I've decided to make the story a mixtape consisting solely of British (+ Irish) bands. \o/

*iz a nerd* /o\

( Have a shipping meme! )

Aaaand back to studying I go! (On a Sunday morning. My life rocks so hard.)

WIP meme stolen from slashxmistress!

Post a single sentence from each WIP you have (or as many as you want to pick). No context, no explanations. (I can count, I just cheated!)

1. “Dude, now it’s like Ryan’s dick is made of steel!”

2. Jon breathes in faster and faster and faster, and suddenly his vision blacks out and is filled with images instead, snapshots of cement, an arm, a bright light, Pete, pale, black, black, black, and it is only then Jon sees it, and he shoots up with his eyes unfocused and misty, and he falters as he rushes towards the battle and shouts, “Protect Pete!” but no one hears him.

3. They had been fighting, then they had been kissing, then they had been in the bedroom, undressing, and Brendon had felt so alive and soft. “Here’s the thing,” Ryan says, taking the courage to voice a few weeks’ worth of self-reflection, “I was just your average guy who hadn’t gotten laid in a while, was horny, and got off on knowing no one had fucked him before. That’s pretty shitty.”

4. Brendon swallowed the Oreo and said, “I happen to have a humongous penis! It just doesn’t look it because it’s a grower!”

5. Jon tries to concentrate on making it an exceptional experience for Spencer, but at the back of his mind is a sinister notion. He hopes that if Spencer in the future ever needs to think back to a day when he was happy, he will think of this day. If Spencer is being pushed against a bed and tears are rolling down his cheeks – “Jon? Are you coming?” Spencer asks excitedly.


I am very aware that two of those solely concentrate on their dicks. What can I say? It's a source of endless fascination to me. I'd love to finish any of these. And goddamn, I should be studying... *bored sigh*